a story from my childhood

'Tell a story from your childhood. Dig deep and try and be as descriptive as you can'

It's day 18 of the blogging everyday in May challenge and I found this topic a bit of a struggle.

I always find talking about my childhood very difficult as I didn't have a very good relationship with my parents.So, this prompt has been hard to write as I remember a lot of the bad times and do not remember many good times! I spend a lot of my childhood with my Nanna who was like my second mum.

I remember this happened on the day my dad was baptised. My dad had a bit of a temper and was very impatient, so it was easy to get on the wrong side of him. I was about fourteen at the time and my brother was around six or seven years old.

I can see this so clearly in my head as if it was yesterday. My mum was standing in the kitchen, my brother was sitting on the floor and myself and my dad were on the sofa. I had been reading the newspaper which was next to me on the cushion, when  my dad started to say a prayer for the meal. I remember it was baked beans on toast. I closed my eyes and bent my head with respect.

When my dad said 'Amen,' he started to shout and scream at me saying I had my eyes open during the prayer and was looking at the paper. I was so upset because I hadn't; I had just bent my head down. So I said, 'No I didn't.' At that moment, which I have never forgotten, he got up and hit me so hard that he knocked my dinner all over me! The fact that my mum said, 'Watch the plate,' to my dad made it even worse. They hadn't believed me!

I remember running upstairs to my attic room crying, and that's where I was left all night. I often felt lonely as a child, when I was with them, as I spent a lot of time in my room away from the arguments! But this and another time were the loneliest I have ever felt!

Over the years, since leaving home and having my girls, we didn't see a lot of him. When I got pregnant with my first daughter they moved away. I didn't visit much as we were never welcome. I felt so sorry for my girls.

The saddest part is that my dad died in a motorcycle accident, not so long ago, and I hadn't seen him for nine years due to his aggressive behaviour. I will never be able to tell him how I felt or to put the past to bed. I will always feel incredibly sad for that.

my favourite photograph

What wonderful memories this photograph holds for me! Here I am in Verona, Italy on a beautiful, sunny day. I always smile when I see this picture because I look so happy. You will normally find me hiding behind sunglasses as I am camera shy, so this is very rare!

We had travelled to Lake Garda for a week and had decided to visit Verona for the day. Everything was so perfect, seeing Juliet's balcony, eating pizza sat next to the arena, drinking my favourite Italian tipple, strolling around the sights and listening to violins playing. So romantic!

Have a fabulous Friday,

tips for dealing with difficult co-workers

            'Something difficult about your 'lot in life' and how you are working to overcome it.'

This is the prompt for today's topic and I have to say my lot in life is not a bad one. However, there was a difficulty I was having and this is how I overcame it.

I'm sure we have all come across a Negative Nancy at work at sometime or another. Working with them can be very draining. I once worked with someone who could be very negative as well as putting on a very phony pleasant front. Furthermore, she was terrible for being spiteful and untruthful behind your back. This had a knock on effect with other relationships at work, as I felt people were talking behind my back. It all caused me so many problems and got me down, to the point where I felt sick walking through the door each morning. I needed a strategy to cope. These strategies worked for me.

Put on your armour
I decided I couldn't change the situation but I could change how I reacted to it. Firstly, I decided to put on some 'armour'. I stopped wearing work clothes and began to wear clothes that made me feel more confident and good about myself. Then I began to walk part of the way to work, through a park, to relax me and lift my spirits; a few minutes to be mindful, to use the buzzword.

Kill them with kindness
Once at work, I looked for positivity in everything, aiming to be bright and breezy. I made sure I always had a ready smile for everyone, irrespective of the response, every day. It certainly had the effect of making me feel better.

Assume everyone is an angel
I began to work on the assumption that people always mean well. I tried to take a genuine interest in almost everything everyone had to say, as well as doing my best to put myself in their shoes.

Give yourself a break
Of course, it was not always plain sailing and sometimes I needed a break. So, instead of collapsing in a chair during lunch time, I would often take a short work through the nearest pretty scenery. On warmer days, I would sit and have my lunch on a bench. At other times, I would find a quiet corner and listen to upbeat music on my headphones.

Did all of this make everything and everyone wonderful? Of course not but it did have an effect. I felt better just by being positive. It is harder for people to be negative or undermining when you are smiling, being friendly and interested rather than guarded. Over time it became a virtuous circle rather than a negative bind.

Are there still difficult days? Sure, but these strategies still work for me.

Have a lovely day everyone

a photo an hour in my day

view from my bedroom window

breakfast in bed

walking to work through the park

working with a maths group

coffee and cookie break

looking for mini-beasts

grilled halloumi and salad sandwich for lunch

at the farm shop

keeping up with blogging

made a new friend while out walking

reading and listening to music

salmon and stir-fry veg for dinner 

snuggling on the sofa with a dvd

popcorn and a glass of wine with the movie

candle-lit bath time

 bed with a good book

This was what yesterday looked like. What does your typical day look like?

ten things that make me happy

waking up to a sunny day like this

beautiful sunsets

relaxing on a beach

sitting by the wood burner on a cold winter's night

 lazy weekends reading after a busy week 

freshly brewed coffee

dark organic chocolate

magical carousel rides

(not my photo)

movie nights with Audrey Hepburn

(not my photo)

flowers around my home

What makes you happy?

my public apology

Welcome to day 13 of the blogging challenge, and today we are issuing a public apology. This apology is for my girls and my partner.

To my girls; I apologise for:

getting far too excited when we go to see pop concerts (especially McFly)! I know that I am very loud, get very excited and tend to scream a bit too much, but I just can't help myself. I know you cringe and wish you were not sat anywhere near me, but at least you have a few days of peace afterwards when I have no voice! You know how much I love to live it large!!

I'm looking forward to seeing Mcfly again with you in August. Counting the days off on the calendar already! I promise to try and be good but I apologise in advance if I'm not!

To Steve, my long suffering partner; I apologise for;

making you sit through hour after hour of musicals and Disney films. I'm really trying hard not to sing songs from Mary Poppins, The Sound Of Music and Calamity Jane every day when I'm getting ready for work. I know it scares you when I sing Do-Re-Mi because I know every single word! Oops, sorry I'm starting to sing it now!

Have a great Monday everyone

when in rome.....

There is only one answer when I'm asked 'if there is anywhere in the world you want to be right now where would you be?' Rome, Rome, Rome. Rome has my heart.

I visited Rome with S for a short break in February 2009 and I fell in love. As a child I had always wanted to go there, I think the Audrey Hepburn film Roman Holiday had something to do with this! Here are a few memories from our holiday there. (memories taken on a little compact camera, before we got a DSLR).

The Trevi Fountain lived up to expectations, it was romantic and beautiful. Sitting at the side eating Italian ice-cream was heaven and something that I will never forget. The saying is that if you throw a coin in you will visit again. I threw in more just to make sure!

 A view of the Collosseum

Inside the Collosseum

The view from St Peter's Square

Every where you turn there is ancient history just waiting to be explored.

Spanish steps

I'm hoping to go back one day and re-live all those wonderful experiences we shared while we were there. Fantastico!