Saturday, 25 May 2013

School days

'Something someone told you about yourself that you'll never forget'
You know how cruel children can sometimes be at school? Well, unfortunately for me I always seemed to be the odd one out. I think this was due to the fact that I spent a lot of time ill as a child and never had the chance to build those first friendships. Being shy, sensitive, quiet and having an unsettled home life didn't help.

I have never told anyone in my adult life about this so writing this post is a way of release for me, well that's what I'm hoping!

There was one particular girl who made my school life a misery. She took an instant dislike to me and I didn't know how to handle it as I had no self-confidence at all. I remember this all started when I was seven and continued until I was thirteen. Talk about dread going to school! Some Sunday evenings I would be sick, because I was worried, so my mum would think I had a stomach bug and keep me off school the next day.

My parents were not the easiest people to talk to and part of me thought I must have done something to offend her and that's why she was being so horrible. So I kept it to myself. She came up with names for my lips and long hair and this stuck right through school. It was mean and cruel and I have never forgotten as I was called it by lots of girls. I was much taller than the rest of the girls in my class as well and started stooping to look smaller.

Isn't it silly that I still have difficulty saying and writing down the names she called me. It was incredibly personal and I began to believe what she said was right. I remember having an operation and being off school for six weeks. The first thing she said to me on my first day back was 'I wish you had died.' Lovely!

I put up with the bullying for years. One day, at the age of thirteen, she called me the usual names that I was known as. But instead of getting upset, I turned around and asked her what she wanted me for. She was stunned, shocked and didn't know what to say. I walked away and never looked back.

After that day she never called me those names again, I remember thinking if only I had been brave enough to stand up to her when I was seven! I know to some this might sound trivial but it really did knock my confidence and it took me a long, long time to regain it. (Still working on this.)

Have a lovely weekend



18 comments:

  1. Aww. Those people need to know something like 'getting a life'. Glad you're recovering, though!!! :)

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    1. Thanks so much, it's wierd how words stick with you isn't it?

  2. How miserable:( I had times of unhappiness at school, I certainly was not with the most popular crowd (now I know that might have been a very good thing! LOL) But happily I do not recall anything like you have described. I am glad you are continuing to get stronger!

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    1. Thanks for that, I certainly would not want to experience that again. Children can be so mean can't they! x

  3. "at the age of thirteen, she called me the usual names that I was known as. But instead of getting upset, I turned around and asked her what she wanted me for."

    I like the way you responded.

    She was so mean this girl. I hope she is not like that anymore.

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    1. I wish I had responded like that years before and saved myself some misery. x

  4. Way to stand up for your self and having confidence always seems to be a work-in-progress for me as well. Thank you for sharing your personal experiences and I am so happy that you didn't let them define you!

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    1. Thanks so much for your lovely thoughts, it's really kind of you.
      Have a lovely day:)

  5. Kids can be so cruel. I also had some bulling at school and high school was among the most miserable years of my life. So I know exactly how you feel.

    http://mels-corner.blogspot.com/

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    1. I'm sorry you felt like that too, it's rubbish isn't it. I ended up with no confidence by the time it all finished.
      Thanks for your thoughts, I really appreciate it.

      Have a lovely day x

  6. I completely understand you... I had a similar situation, only that on my early teens and it was hard to over come. I did believe that some of the things those girls said were true!! how silly. But to me, at that time, was my world. finally they graduated of high school, time passed and live gave me the chance to see them some 12 years later.... it made me realized Karma does come to you. Better to be nice to others :)
    Thanks for sharing your story.
    XX


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  7. It does become your world, I totally know what you mean. I've never seen these girls again as they moved out of my town, it makes me wonder if they have changed.
    Thanks so much for your thoughts. :)

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  8. ohh.. I know how you feel, dear! been through all this as well. I was too sensitive and shy, too unconfident.. didn't know how to handle all these things. Well, children are so cruel sometimes. That's true. But I believe that what goes around, comes around. Whoever did bad to you, hurt you - will suffer themselves. In some kind of way. Don't wish anyone to suffer... but that's how it is.
    At least - you have to be proud and happy of yourself - that you passed through it, and now you know... who you really are. And you will be more caring for your children! :)

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  9. I'm so sorry you had to experience this as well. I sometimes wonder if you become an easier target if you are shy and quiet. I hope you have come through this too.
    I worried about this happening to my girls but fortunately they did not have many issues at school. A teacher once told me that my girls were good friends to others and caring which was lovely to hear.
    Thanks so much for your thoughts x

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  10. That is just awful! Im sorry this happened to you! I used to be shy and quiet too and was intimidated by the tall girls who sat in the back. They used to laugh at me but I never knew if they called me names. Still, it made me insecure and up til now, I dont attend school reunions.

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    1. I'm sorry this happened to you too, girls can be so mean. Where I went to school they never had school reunions but like you I wouldn't have gone.

      Have a lovely day x

  11. How terrible! Kids can be so mean. It makes you wonder what was going on in her life to make her act in such an awful way.

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    1. They really can be! I don't see her anymore as she moved away. I'm glad about that as I think the feelings of insecurity would surface if I saw her again. x